Selection

Those whom we choose for mating and bonding may be for pheromones, physical, or social characteristics. These initial attractants however do not tell us whether the relationship will be long lasting or will abruptly end after the honeymoon phase. At the start of every relationship most people are on their best behaviors trying not to step on toes and have the betterment of their partner and the propagation of the experiences they share in mind. Once comfort the false personas subside and the real identities of our partners emerge from behind their facades. The timing of their emergence will vary from person to person, but the results are the same. It is the true character of the individual who will make or break the relationship.
Whether people find this true nature out later in a relationship and stay within it for financial or familial reasons are another issue, but an awareness and judgment of character does come into play and if this is indicative of a negative the pairing will divide. It is the selfish individual who gave rise to morality. This code that is taught in social and religious settings is meant as a standard guideline of interpersonal relations to allow the altruistic (giving) individual to avoid the pitfalls of the abusive, draining, and selfish, leaving the encounters brief. This surmising dictates our emotions toward the other and in an independent and rational relationship a balance that is fair is referred to as reciprocity. It is relationships of this kind that are mutually beneficial and therefore aid in the positive development and growth of both persons, which lead to tighter bonds that are most commonly referred to as kin. In short, the duration of a pairing will be equivalent to “how good of a trading partner they are” (Steven Pinker).